Checking In

Today we have concluded the first quarter of 2020 (thanks be to God). I've decided it's time for me to check in on the goals I set for this year to see how I'm doing - considering we are 25% through this revolution around the sun, I'm hoping I've gotten to about that metric with each goal. Granted, part of me is prepared for the most assured 'plot twist' thwarting of these goals; alas, in an effort to maintain some sense of normal, I march on.

Goals for 2020:
I suppose I've got only one goal, but it's got a lot of meat on its bones...I'm going to endeavour to bring life back into BALANCE. Here's my vision of how that will look (as of today):
Let's just stop here for a moment. We're in the preamble and already off track. Balance - ha! The whole world is upside down right now - I'm off to a great start!

- I will leave work at work. I've disabled work email notifications on my phone and will commit to being fully present in the office. I will also be fully present when I'm at home.
Hmmmm - I'm clearly at -12% in terms of progress on this goal as I've actually moved my work INTO my home. Separated no more by physical distance, multiple computers running at once, the only way is up on this one, people. I am doing better, however, about not touching work on weekends. We'll call that a 2% rate of progress and move the overall rating to negative ten percent growth.

- I will move more. Self-care will be a priority - not on the bottom of the list, but at the top. I will take better care of myself physically so I am better able to engage with my family, friends and colleagues.
The reduction in commute time from home to office has negatively impacted my daily step goal. However, the sanity preservation measures now in place have overcome that negative impact as multiple dog walks have become critical in this time of Corona. Therefore, I squarely mark progress on this goal at 15%, bringing our overall level of progress into the positive by a whopping 10%.

- I will tend to my mental, spiritual and emotional health and encourage my children to do the same. This will look different ways - reading, engaging in soul level conversations, writing more.
I'm actually laughing out loud now - how naive I was a mere 3.5 months ago! Mental health is now a combination of crying, dog walking, an adult beverage here and there and the hope that one day we will go out to eat and sit at a restaurant. It has become clear of late that I'm obsessive about crumbs on the kitchen counter and I've identified that reality as a trigger for me. We'll call that self-awareness and allot a 2% progress on said goal. Spiritual health - I'm doing better on this as my daily prayers have increased exponentially - it matters not that said prayers often contain language including, "Please Lord do not let me blow my top...again. I'm reading more and our family has had wonderful soul level conversations so that, combined with prayer, gets us to a solid 15% progress on this goal. I've not been as committed to writing as I'd like, this year has caused me to spend more time strategizing than pontificating. However, with Wednesdays announcement that schools are out for the academic year, I see mental/spiritual/emotional health being tightly wound in this medium going forward. I'll give me 2% progress so far, but anticipate healthy gains in the near term. I'm at a whopping 17% progress on this goal. Go me.

- I will set boundaries so that our whole family has times of rest - acknowledging that no one is able to do all the things, and that everyone needs to learn to choose what is life giving to them.
I'd like to thank the Covid-19 for assisting in the near 100% achievement of this goal. Rest is in abundance these days and the pendulum now swings the other way - making sure we stay engaged somehow without being around people. We're at a solid 75% on this one, y'all.

- I will be fully present with my children and husband. Time is running short on the days when all four of us live under one, single roof - it's gone so quickly and I don't want to miss a minute.
Cue. The. Laugh. Track. Part of me feels almost clairvoyant having even typed this a mere 95ish days ago! I actually am enjoying, mostly, having our little brood under one roof. Playing games, watching movies, no Mama Taxi, these are good gifts for which I'm grateful. We're sitting at a solid 50% and by the time the rona leaves the building, I'm confident we'll have nailed this one completely. I hope that we don't forget it too quickly once the movement hither and yon resumes, because I'm fully aware it's a gift. 

- I will enjoy living closer to family. We live closer to our parents and my sister, brother-in-law and nephews than we did for 4 years and while we don't see each other super often, I want the time we share to be meaningful.
This is a kick in the gut - if I had Alanis Morisette handy, I'd be playing her Ironic. We live closer to family for sure, but we're not able to visit. We're trying to figure out ways to interact meaningfully regardless. I suppose the good news is we had 4 years living nearly 4000 miles from one another to practice. It doesn't make it easier tho. We sit squarely at 15% and I don't see that improving any time real soon.

- I will talk with dear friends more regularly.
This coming week is "Spring Break" - ha! The gift of that break within a break is the opportunity to unplug and actually make this happen. Today I sit at a full on 10% progress (pitiful, indeed), but next week I plan to ratchet that up to near 50%. The real goal is sustainability...we'll see how that goes.

All in all 2020 has been a humdinger! And I must say that just when I thought I'd seen most everything that could be dished out, this Covid business came out of left field and surprised the heck out of me! I'm more aware now of the gift of time, the gift of personal space, the gift of living with people I love and like. And I hope this "Great Pause" has lasting effects in the way we live life. While I'm sick of crumbs on the counter, there's something lovely about being in our home. There's something fun about laughing together and not rushing to the next thing. There's glory in not having to even say the words 'standardized tests'. While it's not all a picnic, I'm curious to see how we adjust permanently to this temporary normal. Cheers to the end of the first quarter of 2020.